Nihilistic Death

I stood there and looked at my life laying there on the ground. Cold,stiff, filled with regret. Was there nothing I could have done? Or was there more I could have done? Dead, I lay, on the carpet. No longer clinging to life but experiencing a strange transition. It’s almost just like everything I thought it’d be but yet I feel unfulfilled. Separation from the body was always my ultimate goal but not like this. It all seemed like a waste of time looking back at the past. I don’t know how to feel or if I feel. I don’t know what to think or even if I was thinking. I was just there. Staring. Fuck.

An air opens. I dont know how to describe it than anything else but an air because I could just feel the wind blowing past me almost as if I was alive again. Weird. The wind stops and a door with a key in the lock shows up. I turn back to my body and I’m still there cringing ,locked up as if I fought for my life. What an idiot. I stood there taking a long look at myself. I was some kid who couldn’t hack it so I OD’d. Haha You think I’d be sad. I turned to the door again with a crazy amount of curiosity and wondered, “Am I gonna get a new body?”,”Will I just phase through?” ,”Am I just gonna wander around this plane?” Fuck it , I grabbed the key, turned the lock and opened the door. Black. I could feel the pull on my skin or what looked like skin. My skin started crawling and reacting. “Oh fuck ,oh fuck ,oh fuck!” Can’t close the door. I’ve gone too far. The air that opened before came back but stronger and this time, brought suction. The pain , unimaginable. I felt my head separate from my body and then I still felt everything in my body. The whole process of it nearly drove me or what was left of me insane, and then it stopped….(Enter The 4th Dimension)

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